The great subject of the email was enough for me to read further, and it only got better.
"Did you know obesity kiIIs more and more people every year? We know you hate the extra pounds, the ugly look and the social stigmata attached to fat people."
I can honestly say I had no idea that fat people were prone to random, holy bleeding in social situations. Shit, health risks are nothing compared to bleeding patterned after the wounds of Christ. Does that make McDonald's the Romans?