Thursday, October 05, 2006

Limbo in Limbo

The Pope just "abolished" (strange choice of words) the concept of limbo. Now unbaptised babies don't go to hell. Like dogs, all babies go to heaven, which is great, I'm all for it.

Pope Benedict XVI, after deliberation by Vatican theologians, is abolishing the concept of Limbo that put the souls of unbaptized infants at risk.

While it was never a formal part of the church's doctrine, the existence of Limbo was taught until recently to Catholics around the world, The Times of London said. Limbo was described in Britain as "a place of rest where the souls of the just who died before Christ were detained."

So this begs a couple of questions in my mind.

1. What does the church believes happens to all those good souls who lived before Christ. They used to be stuck in limbo. Is the church saying they never were? Is the church saying that now that the Pope has made this decree that they're all rushing up to Heaven? Won't that make it tough for St. Peter to sort through everyone. Do they get a handstamp for re-entry in the event the next Pope re-establishes limbo?

2. So all babies go to heaven. Doesn't that erase original sin? When do babies start sinning now? Is it the first time they spit up on mommy's new cashmere sweater right before she and daddy go to the Opera? Is it the first time they pee on the person changing their diaper? How about when they start singing the Wiggles?

3. Limbo a concept based on no tangible evidence, a notion created through faith is now overturned. How does that argument work? It's amazing to just decide that something based on faith doesn't exist. What evidence do you use to argue that something that never had evidence in the first place is no longer true. Turns out our belief that God has a beard is wrong. Now we believe that God must have a goatee and an eyebrow ring. Why? Um, because it was revealed through careful reading of ancient scriptures, and our local tattoo artist screwed up my girlfriend's tat and that's what the God looks like on her lower back.


4. From Liz's friend Paige:

And Liz, before I read the article, I had this great image of the pope standing next to a limbo line screaming, "No! No! I prohibit you from seeing how low you can go!"

I wanted to make a joke about that kind of limbo and just couldn't. This is perfect.

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