Wednesday, December 20, 2006

Best of Where is My Mind 2006: The First Quarter

As a kid I really found New Years exciting. We would go to a friends house and there would be neighbors and kids and I'd stay up late. There would be games, and I could try to impress the grownups with just how smart I was, and how good I could be at games. Then I'd retire downstairs to be humbled by my peers at Nintendo and ping-pong. One of the other great parts about New Years as a child, and even now, is that it forces upon people a kind of short term nostalgia. It brings out the top 100 songs of the year, the 10 best highlights on SportsCenter, the 50 most important news stories, the 5 best books, etc. As a person who likes to categorize and count things, and one who likes to be reminded of things I already vaguely know, this time of year is great. So instead of offering a top ten movie list (I don't think I saw more than 5-6 movies anyway) or something like that. I'm going to selfishly and arrogantly recap my favorite lines from this blog. Not entire posts, but the sections and sentences of which I am most proud. If you have other sentences or sections that you think I'm ignoring, something you find particularly fun -- 1st I'm flattered and 2nd you should post it in the comments.

So here, in short (a rarity for me) is the best of this blog-- January - March.


Aaron whines about the time spent waiting for food during restaurant week.
You'd think, with the time we had to wait they were inventing a new country from which to have a cuisine. So first they had to find land, cultivate a culture. get invaded. Retake the country. Develop a national identity. Find and sow local crops. Build a cuisine. Export said cuisine to DC...and then make and serve our food. I feel like an entire Jared Diamond book about the rise and fall of Spanish food could have been written in the time it took to actually get our food. But then again, I think maybe I'm being a little overdramatic. Like I said, it felt like a long time.

The injured ankle prevents further injury--to Aaron's pride
Later in the party some of the more rhythmically competent attendees began to shake: "groove things" and "what your momma gave yous" and generally proceed to "get down." Someone came over and asked if I'd add my awkwardness to the assembled appendages and asses. I slyly reached for my left pant leg. Sorry can't.

I think I may start bringing the air cast to parties when I'm healthy. God bless you AirCast. You protect my ankles and my pride.


Of toddlers, dancers and skaters
he last time I went ice skating was as a senior in college. To describe my efforts that evening as ice skating is much like comparing a toddler who pulls himself up to stand using the coffee table to Martha Graham. In each case the participant is wholly overmatched by gravity, entirely without grace, barely stable, and eager to celebrate even the most basic level of proficiency--which in due course returns them to their humbled normative status. Oh and there's also a good chance that in each case their failure has made their pants wet.


Taxes and guessing games
You fill out your taxes trying to get the right answer. But all along there is a predetermined answer, that you're supposed to arrive at. So it's a little annoying. It's like if the electric company asked you to estimate how much your bill should be and then had the power to punish you for getting it wrong.

As you can see some months engender better stuff, apparently March was mainly uninspiring.

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