Welcome Back Billy

I've been loading albums into I-tunes in anticipation of the arrival of my shiny new ipod mini. It's silver. Emmet informs me that I am "a girls blouse" for owning a mini. But I couldn't resist the new mini. It has a better battery life (18 hours vs 8) and was 20% less. I'm realizing that the 4GB size is going to suit me just fine. I have more music than that, but I'm a skipper. I rarely listen to an entire album. So I guess I just pick playlists with songs that I'll actually want to hear.

The great part about loading songs into itunes is that you have reason and access to listen to songs/groups/artists you've been ignoring. No greater casualty than Will Oldham. Bonnie "Prince" Billy (aka Palace, Palace Brothers, or Palace Music) is a genious. No qualifications to that statement and none needed. The man is brilliant. He makes music that is earthy and scary and funny and sexy.

I see a darkness is probably the best of his albums. The title track was covered by Johnny Cash on his American Man series. Though, I've listened to ISAD upwards of 500 times all the way through, none of those sessions has been in the past 10 months. I've been on an unintentional Billy boycott. But today was different. I loaded ISAD into my itunes and gave the old standby a spin. The lyrics that caught my ear for what must be the 1,000th time came from the title track :

Well I hope that someday buddy
We'll have peace in our lives
Together or apart
Alone or with our wives
And we can stop our whoring
And pull the smiles inside
And light it up forever
And never go to sleep
My best unbeaten brother
That isn't all I see
Oh no, I see a darkness
Oh no, I see a darkness (x4)
Did you know how much I love you
Is a hope that some how
you you can save me from this darkness

The Return of Extra Vaganza

I'm back to posting photos on Extra Vaganza. One from the plane ride and one of the Gateway Arch (in St.L.)

I'm hoping to get out and take some more photos of Seattle, and my environs. Stay tuned.

Budweiser Brewery Tour

The Guys in front of "The Masher"

You Betcha.

The Onion is funny. But it's at it's best when it makes fun of things that the editors understand. Minnesota, Wisconsin and Iowa are often the best lampooned subjects owing to birth of the Onion in Madison. But this take on Minnesota is priceless. (Incidently, I got to be back in MN for a bit on my trip to and from St. Louis. I miss the place. It's always going to feel a little like home).

ST. PAUL, MN—Although many of its highways and bridges are in severe disrepair, the traditionally undemanding state of Minnesota isn't comfortable asking for more interstate funding, sources reported Monday.

"Oh, we wouldn't want to bother the U.S. government—they've got more than enough on their plate as it is," Minnesota Gov. Tim Pawlenty said. "Most of the potholes on I-90 are less than four feet wide. We get by just fine. I wouldn't want anyone all the way over there in Washington to be worrying about little ol' us."

According to U.S. Department of Transportation records, Minnesota has not requested an increase in highway funds for 10 years, in spite of the fact that the majority of their roads are plagued by rutted or uneven surfaces, cracked pavement, potholes, and other deterioration.

"If it were a life or death situation, you can bet your bippy we'd ask for it, but since it isn't..." Pawlenty said. "Well, we can make do with the transportation-department budget they decided to give us back in 1995. That was more than generous.

...
Joshua Bolten, U.S. Director of the Office of Management and Budget, said the national government "guilted" Minnesota into accepting some money to fund a child-safety-seat program three years ago, by repeatedly urging them to "think of the children."

"After all it took to get them to take the money, they wouldn't stop thanking us," Bolten said. "The following day, Minnesota congressmen kept dropping by with cakes and cookies. I mean, the hand-stitched quilt Rep. Mark Kennedy (R-MN) made was beautiful, but a gift was really, really unnecessary."

Architecture would interest me.

Once more, let us remember how badass Bob Dylan is. He's got some thoughts on modern rock.

"I know there are groups at the top of the charts that are hailed as the saviours of rock'n'roll and all that, but they are amateurs. They don't know where the music comes from," he wrote, adding, “I wouldn't even think about playing music if I was born in these times... I'd probably turn to something like mathematics. That would interest me. Architecture would interest me. Something like that."

Doesn't this also seem like something Johnny Cash would have said. You cannot imagine mick jagger saying it, because he's too obsessed with fitting in (still, after 40 years).

Meet Me in St. Louis

The gang is getting back together. Neil Gray from the North, Aaron from the West and ABJ from the midwest will come together, and by their powers combined...who the hell knows what'll happen. I'm guessing it'll be a giant nerd fest, with some overtures towards drunkeness rebuffed by good old fashioned adult responsibility. We'll be just like the Saint Lunatics, but without Nelly, and without rap careers and without Mascot (the one whose only role in the group seems to be wearing a half mask a la phantom of the opera).

My flight(s) take me to luxurious and thrilling Missoula, Montana. That's right. Missoula. I travel from Seattle to Missoula (to reiterate fucking Missoula montana is part of my itinerary) on a prop plane. I'm jazzed, working out as I have been, I'm sure we'll make better time than if I were my previous heavier self.

Then I fly to Minneapolis. Sit on the runway there. Then I fly to Saint Louis. Total travel time upwards of 9 hours. Sweet!

But it'll easily be worth it to see Neil and Aaron. Not sure what we'll do there. I'm thinking the Arch may be involved. And potentially the art museum, if for no other reason than that it's called the SLAM. And with that, somewhere the guy from Onyx just got 22 cents worth of royalties from the soundtrack in my head.

Long story short, I'm heading back to the Mid West for the weekend and beyond, and I'm loving it. The land of plump citizens. Gateway to the west, bi-yatch, it's St. Louis. Etc. I'm sure there will be no end of Nelly references and potentially one of us can try to work in a few Chingy references. For instance, "Hey ABJ where are the bath towels?" ABJ, "Right thurr." See works like a charm. Plus we can exclaim that others should "shake a tail feather" in honor of Murphy Lee. And finally we can all come together to mock the silliness that is J-Kwon. "Tipsy" while catchy is the one of the most vapid things to enter pop culture since the "I Like Girls Who Wear Abercrombie and Fitch" attrocity visited upon Earth by LFO.

Anyways...I can only assume that Aaron has moved out of his Smooth Jazz phase. Otherwise it may get ugly.

Propagannon

So by now many writers and posters with more talent and determination than yours truly have covered the unfolding story of Jeff Gannon (Guckert). For links go to www.rawstory.com or this racy section of Americablog.

Long story short: Gannon is a former gay prositute who was hired by a Republican operative in Texas to pretend to be a journalist and work for a pretend news agency. (a news agency so phony it was denied Capitol Hill press credentials, and which primarily reprinted WH press releases as content) While working for said agency he (Gannon/Guckert, see he used a fake name as a reporter) received daily press passes at the White House and frequently asked questions of the Press Secretary and even the President. Keep in mind that this is a President who rarely submits to interview or questioning. That he would allow a question from anyone is news, that it was a fake journalist for a fake paper potentially trading in sexual favors...well now that seems noteworthy to me. But for some reason Democrats are uneasy about it, and feel guilty.

Two metaphors popped into mind.

1. This guy works for a fake "news" agency. It's the equivalent of the editor for Highlights magazine getting a chance to ask repeated questions of the Press Secretary and the President. Except, of course, I'm assuming that Goofus and Gallant don't have sex for money, and more importantly never pretended to be journalists.

2. The Republicans take anything that looks like scandal and run with it. We tend to pull back and feel guilty. Not unreasonable. But we're playing a team that is using and abusing steroid and snorting amphetamines on the field, and we're worried that it's wrong to take a few vitamins. The rules of the game are changing or have already changed, and putting ourselves at a permanent competitive disadvantage doesn't make sense.

Don't ever abandon principle. Read that last sentence again. I was outraged well before the sex angle came into being. I think the idea of access being granted to a fake journalist is absurd. That that access may have had something to do with untoward behavior and not just ideological cronyism is offensive.

But.... Access being granted to a non-journalist, asking questions on behalf of a non-media entity is noteworthy. That the reporter in question may be a prostitute is also somewhat noteworthy, because it begs the question did his previous life help to ease his transition into his new one. Did he learn details for his journalistic endeavors through pillow talk? Finally, why is it of no concern to the WH that a person can be given access to the press room without a thorough background check, using an assumed name no less? Shouldn't we be vigilant in a time of terror?

Closing from Joe Conason:

Imagine the media explosion if a male escort had been discovered operating as a correspondent in the Clinton White House. Imagine that he was paid by an outfit owned by Arkansas Democrats and had been trained in journalism by James Carville. Imagine that this gentleman had been cultivated and called upon by Mike McCurry or Joe Lockhart—or by President Clinton himself. Imagine that this "journalist" had smeared a Republican Presidential candidate and had previously claimed access to classified documents in a national-security scandal.

Mark Dayton Out In MN.

Mark Dayton just announced that he will not seek reelection to his senate seat in 2006. Sounds from the news articles as though he was facing poor poll results, and maybe was just too battered having closed his office due to the "terror" warnings.

So who comes next? Ezra thinks it could be Garrison Keillor and offers this passage from his book (GK's not EK's) as evidence of the lanky bachelor farmers prowess with framing:

Medicare says that even though you're not working and may need special help with the ordinary business of life, you have value in this society. This is a Democratic idea. Be a howling right-winger if it gives you pleasure, but nonetheless milk comes from cows and Medicare comes from Democrats.

I read that book, and I remember that passage. I got teary-eyed reading it. I wouldn't mind work that got me teary-eyed, for the right reasons, and not out of frustration. It's been a while on that front.

Other candidates: David Wellstone. I don't know what to think of David. He reminds me, from the little contact I've had (seeing him a few times), of his father and that's a great thing.

Other potential candidates:
Al Franken
Mee Moua (1st Hmong State Senator in the nation)
Randy Kelly (conservative mayor of Saint Paul)
Collin Peterson (Conservative Representative from Western MN)
Matt Entenza (progressive State Rep from Saint Paul/Macalester)
Becky Lourey (progressive saint from Iron Range)
Judi Dutcher (Great former republican, from the 'burbs
Alan Page (former purple people eater, and Supreme Court Justice)
Walter Mondale (ride that horse till it can't stand up)
Darack Ebama... (umm..I think I may have made that last one up).

The Cool Kids

When I was in middle school there were cool kids. I have to imagine this is a near universal reality of all middle schools. In high school diverse and divergent interests replace being "cool" as the sole arbiter of external worth. But in middle school, at least for me, being cool was THE goal to which a great many people aspired. Second to being cool was being able to join the cool kids in looking down on others. Third was being ignored. The Worst was being hated by the cool kids.

It seems as though we're about to learn these lessons all over again. Howard Dean's rise to chair of the DNC (scheduled for this weekend) is likely to bring about great scorn and derision from the Republican noise machine. It's going to get really nasty in a hurry. Talking heads informing everyone how out of touch Dean is, and how they (GOP) got exactly what they wanted. Etc. Like the cool kids, Republicans have bravado and perception on their side. Objective worth and value are not the currency of middle school "cool." I expect hours and hours and days and days of Republican mockery and puffery (they must have the op research books on Dean, and be dying to use them--- Did Dean perform abortions? Let's just ask the question a lot, and then it'll become an issue). But the real concern I have is what are Conservative/Establishment Democrats going to do. My guess, having been burned by the aforementioned groups many times, is that they are going to rush to the ed boards and press rooms of America to explain how they knew Howard Dean was flawed. And how they agree with the cool kids.

The last lesson from middle school: Those who were toadies were souless and never got to be cool. Those who were worthy of scorn were always later worthy of praise. So it shall be with this.

Hooters Encouraging Healthy Choices

From the Washington Post:

"Speaking of doctors, physician-Sen. Tom Coburn (R-Okla.), a new member of the Senate Judiciary Committee, was at last week's meeting on a bill restricting class-action suits. "You know," he said, "I immediately thought about silicone breast implants and the legal wrangling and the class-action suits off that.
"And I thought I would just share with you what science says today about silicone breast implants. If you have them, you're healthier than if you don't. That is what the ultimate science shows. . . . In fact, there's no science that shows that silicone breast implants are detrimental and, in fact, they make you healthier."
So bigger really is better? Who knew? "

Do you figure this is just as demonstrable and valid as Bill Frist and the AIDS tears?

Doctor Coburn, T&A, M.D.

Joe Trippi is a tool

And not a really useful thing like a wrench, but something like a garden weasel or pocketfisherman that is hawked late at night to world weary insomniacs with ready cash and eager hopes. I just lost the little respect I'd had for Trippi. Before I thought he was the relentlessly self promoting hero of every one of his stories.

I saw Trippi in Boston over Thanksgiving. He gave a talk where he pulled a muscle patting Republicans on the back, and tried very hard to explain how terrible Kerry was. After the primary Trippi could be counted on to tell anyone in earshot how bad Dean was, and how poorly things went. It felt a little like someone trying to polish their resume while badmouthing their employer. It's a hard trick to pull off. Then there was this article.

"Dean had really never run for anything before in his life," Trippi explained. "The first contested race of his life was for president, and he was making rookie mistakes."
Secondly, "nobody with a brain would work for us," he said.

Dean ran for governor 5 times. Maybe what Trippi means is that because Vermont is small...it doesn't count as an election. (Which is a fairly poor GOTV approach).

Vermont's population is 608,827. Dick Gephardt's district has 621,690 people. I guess those 13,000+ voters are the difference between really having an election and just pretending. Even stranger: Howard Dean received 148,059 votes in his last race, and Dick Gephardt received 122,181. Each of their opponents polled at 38% of the vote. Apparently Dick Gephardt also ran a pretend race.

Leonard Boswell the lone Democrat in Iowa represents 585,305 citizens. Clearly he never faced real race. It's nice that Trippi would say as much.

Trippi loves playing the "they're so much better, we're stupid" game. He loves talking about how we have no clue, and are worthless. It's an annoying counter to his relentless proclamation of his own role in creating the next "revolution." It does amaze me, Trippi proclaims Dean and the rest of DFA a revolution, etc. Then after the revolution sputters and is stalled for a bit, he tells anyone who will listen how silly some of us were ("nobody with a brain would work for us") and that he knew all along we would fail.

Those are the qualities I look for in a real leader

UPDATE:

Apparently Trippi was quoted out of context. He emailed someone a copy of his remarks and they read as follows:

All the people who just wanted to be with the winner wouldn't give usthe time of day -- all the pro's wanted to work for John Kerry, ofEdwards or Gephardt someone all the experts thought had a chance --back then no one with a brain wanted to move to Burlington, Vermontand work for a guy with an astersik next to his name.

I guess that's better. Apparently it's not that we were all morons, rather none of us was good enough to be with the winner. Truth be told, I joined the campaign in part out of a recognition that I could carve a role for myself there. So at least in that regard his point feels fitting (to my situation). But.... I seem to remember a whole lot of professional operatives mucking about Dean HQ in the last month or two of the campaign. So to say that we lacked for pro's is kind of innacurate. And while I liked the elephants (as they were nicknamed) their arrival does coincide with our defeat (not their fault, just saying). Trippi then goes on to offer this painful metaphor, in which three teams are playing baseball. It's very confusing.

The miracle was not that the Boston Red Sox came back in the bottom ofthe 9th to beat the little Vermont Bad News Bears. The miracle wasthat the little Vermont Bad News Bears somehow snuck past security goton to the playing field and wailed past the St. Louis Cardinals andthe Boston Red Sox -- took a lead into the bottom of the ninth andtaught the rest of the league how to play better."

Take Me To Victor Conti

Recently I've joined a gym. Or rather, I'm using a 30 day free trial pass. I guess joining involves paying them money. I'm really more borrowing a gym right now. It's a block from my office and is routinely empty except for me and some staffers. So it's perfect.

I've been three times so far (Friday, Monday and Today). I've set a modest routine, running for 15 (then 16, then 17) minutes. Some lifting, pushing, twisting...and other muscle courting efforts. Muscles are sorta like my high school relationship with girls: They seem nice enough, other guys seem to have them. And I certainly feel a strong sense that I should want them, but in all honesty I'm easily distracted, and it seems like a lot of work.

But I've been doing my reps, feeling the burn and using work out terms. (Which seems to have as much of a role in being "buff" or "cut" as actually, you know, moving heavy things from one place to another).

Going to the gym provides several new experiences for me. 1) Watching 4 different tv programs at once. 2) Being naked in "public", or at least in the presence of people not societally obligated to tolerate my naked self (ie, parents and significant others). Number one has proven fairly uneventful. Same with number 2. Having played tennis in high school and having last period gym meant that I avoided being naked with other folks in high school. And frankly, that's just fine. Though I start to wonder what I was afraid of.

But these observations are merely prologue for the basis of this post: Aaron's exercise goals. So I have set out for myself the following goals, and welcome suggestions for meeting them.

1). I want to be able to run a 5K race in under 25 minutes.
2). I want to weigh something like 170-175, but be strong.
3). It'd be great to have some definition...and less tummy. And tummy is the right term because I look a bit like a kid with a juice box fed belly. No tone.
and most importantly
4). I want to be able to dunk a basketball. In college I was able to touch the rim of a regulation basketball hoop with my wrist. So that's about 5 inches above the rim. But I couldn't ever dunk. Bigger hands and/or about 4-8 inches of vertical were required. Never happened.

So my free time at work and quest for better information about exercise led me to search for exercises that help increase leaping ability. There were tons, some really helpful, others that read like the rejected copy from a 3am infomercial. My favorite though, was this one:

March Muscle Madness
Wanna dunk? This month's column dishes out an assist for your basketball training and conditioning.
LET'S FACE IT, WE ALL WANT TO DUNK. I mean, nothing says, "This is my house" more effectively than a two-handed, hang-on-the-rim-with-your-knees-at-your-elbo ws Shaq monster jam. "

Aside from stupid writing this seemed fairly normal. For a bit. There is the obligatory inclusion of "slang" to prove that while white, the author knows how to "hoop it up." Some of the exercises seem to make sense: plyometrics-- sounds about right, but strengthening your wrists... that sure seems out of place. Later in the article we learn that the "experts" involved are two guys who play "varsity" (o.ma.god, varsity?!) basketball in Colorado Springs.

Colorado Springs, hmmm. And it was that glanced up at the top left corner of the article, and saw the Focus on the Family insignia.

Yup, I'd been reading "A Focus on the Family Magazine for Teen Guys " Makes me wonder, you think John Podesta could take James Dobson on the low blocks? Could Alan Keyes drain a three from the corner if guarded by Dennis Kucinich. (answer, yes, Dennis plays terrible perimeter defense)

Hmm.. Maybe the wrist strengthening exercises for FOF reading boys are different from those of people I knew in high school, certainly the magazine that prompted WNHS efforts wasn't FOF's.